As I approach graduation from the Journalism and Technical Communication program, I’d like to note some complaints I’ve had regarding language use during my time here. I’ve learned a lot in these last three years from books, podcasts, Wikipedia, C-Span, documentaries and jobs. I also learned a little from classes, and I’d like to arrogantly spread this knowledge to leave the campus in better shape than that in which I found it. In the following list of sayings and words, I’ll explain some common problems in language use.

“All The News That’s Fit To Print”
The slogan for The New York Times, “All The News That’s Fit To Print,” was coined by Adolph Ochs in 1897. This was apparently a jab at other New York newspapers that were known for yellow journalism. But Ochs published another newspaper besides the Times. The New York Times Company now owns The Boston Globe, the International Herald Tribune, and dozens of regional newspapers. Still, the New York Times maintains the slogan, “All The News That’s Fit To Print.” How do they get people to buy newspapers that they, themselves, imply is not part of the news that’s “fit” to print, and may very well be eligible for the slogan, “Other Crap That We Also Print”? It’s past time for the Times to change its slogan.

“People Watching”
Many people claim to be “people watchers.” These people are voyeurs.

Transitioning
“Transiting” is a verb from the root verb, “transit.” Adding “ion” to the root transfers it to “transition,” a noun. Adding “ing” to the noun transits “transition” to “transitioning,” another verb! “Transitioning” is the same as “transiting,” but with an extra syllable that robs us of precious milliseconds of productivity.

Ironic
Isn’t it ironic that I received a scholarship on my birthday? No! This word is more frequently misused than Victoria’s secret catalogs. Alanis Morissette’s song, “Ironic,” contains no irony, which she contends is the only ironic part about it. (She’s wrong. It’s not ironic because the fact that she called the song “Ironic” didn’t cause it to not contain any irony.) I tried adding parenthetical statements to the lyrics to include actual irony. One line was, “It’s like rain on your wedding day (when you’re marrying a meteorologist who said that you should choose that day).” If you don’t understand the word, don’t use it. Better to remain silent and thought a fool than to say that it’s ironic to remove all doubt.

Paradigm
The word, “paradigm,” has applications in science and grammar, but it’s too often used as a substitute for the word “model.” If you say, “The system for our canned food drive is a model for others,” people will understand it and improve their programs by making them similar to yours. If you say, “The system for our canned food drive is a paradigm,” people will assume you’re doing something complicated, their programs won’t be as effective because they won’t know to copy your program, and poor children will die because of your arrogance.

Revenue Enhancements
If I’m having a hard time paying the bills for a given month, I could try getting “revenue enhancements.” And by “revenue enhancements,” I mean “money gained from threats to take people away from their families in handcuffs and lock them in cells.” But if I said what I mean, people wouldn’t like me. With the term, “revenue enhancements,” I can reap the benefits of Stockholm Syndrome wherein my victims feel bad for me because I’m soft-spoken, and I just need a break. Of course, I wouldn’t do this, but I know of a few people who would.

Another year has come to an end. Exams are just around the corner. The last papers are going to be due and we are all scrambling to find time.

What is around the corner for us? For some, its back to the daily grind of playing video games in their parents' basements (I hope that doesn’t apply to too many). Others will get their 'entry level position in X field to advance my skills and become a valuable asset to Y company.' For a select few, it’s time for your dream job.

For me, the closing of the year brings one more summer before I’m actually done. I’m in my fourth year here at Ferris and with one more I can finalize two Bachelor’s degrees and hopefully get a good breadwinner position.

I’ll be back next year, but a lot of the people I’ve met along the way won’t be. So to the following people, good-bye. It has been great getting to know you. Call me. Come visit me back at Ferris if you can, I’ll get real bored here without you!

Paul Jarema – I’m glad you never partied too hard. Remember, leaders don’t just talk the talk, they walk the walk.

Mal Berry – Keep drinking those Killian’s for me as you’ll be able to afford it.

Kastelin, Aaron – I’ll always write your last name first so it doesn’t alphabatize to the top of lists. Make sure Mal keeps drinking those Killians. You can bring the Smirnoff. And don’t forget rule #23.

Thaddaeus Gommesen – It has been my pleasure. I hope you get that cross country ride and open a B&B/antique shop. I’ll print some flyers for you once I get out of this place.

Bryce Johnson (and parents) – Thanks for storing all my junk. I hope you don’t wear out your bonker. Don’t forget that it’s okay to talk a little less from time to time.

Dennis Ruzicka – Please lend me your green pen! I need it so badly! It has been an eventful year and I’m glad you were always there to help.

And everyone else that I didn’t mention – You all mean something to me.

So, out with the old (students) and in with the new. I hope to meet many more great people in the coming year and throughout my entire life.

Have a great existence!

When it comes to reporting important international events in which the United States plays an enormous role, the mainstream corporate media is once again fulfilling its propagandistic function to protect elite interests by refusing to cover the facts and issues.

Over the past couple weeks, thousands of delegates have been meeting at the United Nations for the Seventh Session of the U.N. Permanent Forum on Indigenous Issues (UNPFII). Representing over 370 million indigenous people worldwide, the forum serves as an arena for addressing pressing issues that indigenous people face across the world with a special focus on the most imperative current crisis: global climate change.

Although it went virtually unreported in the U.S., last September the United Nations General Assembly adopted the “historic” U.N. Declaration on the Rights of Indigenous Peoples. Among other things, the declaration calls for nation-states to include and seek approval from indigenous peoples and nations in the constructing and implementation of any policy or “project affecting their lands or resources.”

The U.N. member states voted overwhelmingly in favor of the declaration with a vote of 143 in support and four opposed. Not surprisingly, the four nations opposed to the declaration, Canada, the United States, New Zealand, and Australia, stand as some of the biggest violators of indigenous human rights.

Because of the immense power of the U.S. in the United Nations, this call for indigenous rights is not legally binding. Being far from the first time, the massive dominance of the United States in determining new international policy and norms has once again blocked efforts at extending human rights and democracy.

U.S. spokespersons noted that document was too broad and didn’t “establish a clear universal principle.”

These assertions are simply embarrassing to any literate teenager who read the Declaration. The message from the U.S. power structure was very clear in that the indigenous people should not play any meaningful role in decisions that effect them and that the U.S. government does not have to be accountable to the marginalized populations of native peoples.

In regards to the discussions currently taking place at the United Nations, which have not been visible through the U.S. corporate media lens, indigenous people argue that they have been “the worst hit by global warming but remain the least responsible for causing it,” as reported at democracynow.org.

Casey Camp-Horinek, an American Indian from Oklahoma and delegate to the United Nations on behalf of the indigenous environmental network, noted on Democracy Now! that corporate exploitation and invasion of indigenous lands and resources are substantially breaking down the “ability of [native peoples] to naturally sustain themselves.”

According to Camp-Horinek, who is attending the current twoweek indigenous meetings at the U.N., the “disproportionate effect of fossil fuels” has violently disrupted weather patterns within a “single generation” thereby destroying native life all across North America, which relies on cooperation and coexistence with the natural setting for human subsidence.

The UNPFII notes that “indigenous peoples are among the first to face the direct consequences of climate change, due to their dependence upon, and close relationship, with the environment and its resources.”

For example, in the Himalayas, due to their high altitudes, rapid glacial melting is in the long term depleting hundreds of millions of people’s water supply as the glaciers shrink at unprecedented rates.

For indigenous people in the Arctic region, the depopulation of traditional animal species and the disappearance of natural food sources are destroying the cultural and social foundation of historic native civilization while also imminently threatening indigenous human survival in the region.

With countless global examples of the exploitation and destruction of indigenous people and their land, the discussions of indigenous issues at the U.N. are not only newsworthy, but pertinent to the survival of hundreds of millions of human beings.

While the United States continues to block efforts in the international arena to include native peoples in important political and economic decision making that holds unwavering implications for their continued existence on this planet, it is the job of the people to stand in solidarity with the struggling indigenous masses to assure that the power structure of government and corporate tyranny will not finally complete their historic genocide of native people everywhere.

Well, here it is. The column that all or most of the writers at the Torch eventually write someday. The final column that Torch writers author before their departure from the newspaper and from Ferris State University. And I’m finding that out of the dozens of columns I’ve written over the years, the 13,000+ photos I’ve taken and the usual snafus that come with any job, that this is far more difficult.

I started at the Torch in early 2004 and since then have performed just about every duty and held every position imaginable at this paper. It has become a lifestyle and it will be hard to adjust to living without it.

So now, here I am five years after I came to Ferris State, sitting on the brink on graduation and the next step. I often find myself lost in thought about the past and what the future holds for me. At 23, I already feel myself growing up and becoming more responsible. I’ve learned so much and experienced so many things; I can’t help but feel that I had the ideal college experience.

Before I get to my general shout-outs, I want to take some space to express my most sincere thanks to my family. Without their support, there is no way that I would be where I am today. Whether it was slipping me a $20 bill for gas back to school or not getting too upset when I dumped the glamorous pharmacy major or helping me move in the middle of the summer heat, you have my sincere gratitude and love.

Drew – We did it. It has taken us a little longer than planned, but it’s done. We’ve been through it all and I can’t imagine having a different roomie. I think McNerny and Cramer both will always have a special place in my heart; the same can probably be said for 823 and 118. I’ll be out to Colorado this summer, you can guarantee that.

Abby and Courtney and Frank – After living with you girls for a year, you’re like sisters to me. If anyone messes with you, they are messing with me. I’ll never forget playing P&A, game nights, bowling or just breaking it down in the living room to MTV Jams.

Brad – Whether it was the pink house or 205 ½, it had two things in common; late night Taco Bell runs and Detroit sports. When we weren’t in BR, we were getting comped at some golf course whether it be Miami, Colorado or Myrtle.

VI – Bungie.net called and said they were going to turn off your account. I’m glad to see you’ve finally ditched the pullout sofa from the pink house and UPS and, hopefully, attained a real bed. I’ll be down to the T real soon.

Jared and Riley – We’re about to be doing it the Port Huron way. First place at the Hooters tournament this year; I can smell it.

Lundeen – SSSSSSSSS! What is this, some kind of Saugatuck joke? I’m sure we’ll be hitting the tables this summer as well as the links.

Brad, Don, Cooper, Gracie Lu, Matt, Ed, Danielle, Cheli – 310 Maple Crew! I’ve had some of the best times in that damp and musty basement. If you ever need a DJ or someone to wear a Scooby Doo costume again, just let me know.

My Fellow Torchies – I am proud to say that I was part of the Torch family for four awesome years. It saddens me that I am leaving, but I have confidence in the fact the Torch will live on in all of you. I hope I have left a positive, lasting impression on all of you, because that is what you have done for me. I have the utmost personal and professional respect for all of you.

Everyone else – You know who you are. I wish I had unlimited space to mention everyone, but you all are my crew. If you ever need anything, I’m only a phone call away.

So what’s next for me? I have accepted a position at Sacred Heart Rehabilitation Center in Richmond, Mich., as an IT Support Specialist and should be moving to the Port Huron area very soon with my new roommates, Jared and Riley.

I’d like to leave you with a passage from a Facebook note I wrote last December, but slightly modified for the times.

“With lots of us graduating soon, I’ve realized that there are things in life that are infinite and are finite.

Finite is our youth and our college careers and the wild and crazy times associated with them. But infinite are the memories, the laughs, the pictures, and the experiences. Infinite are the friendships and bonds we have created over our time at school.

Finite is the person we were before college and infinite is the person we can grow into after college.

Finite is life itself. And the decisions we make, while may fit the bill for the theory of living every day like it’s your last, might not make sense for the long run. But I think we did it right.

I’m incredibly proud of my friends that will be graduating. We did it!

Wherever the next step is taking you, I’ll always remember the times we had at Ferris.

I wish all of you the best of luck in your endeavors. This is not a goodbye note as I am confident that we will still be making memories for years to come.

This is a cheers to the next step.”

Why is it that people only pause to review and reflect on life when they’re at the end of something? It seems like the only time that we stop and think about all the good times, all the hard lessons learned, and all the people we’re glad we’ve met is when we’re about to walk away from them all. During high school, most people spent the entire year counting down until graduation, and yet – signing yearbooks and digging through photos to make that picture board for your graduation party, you realize how much fun you had and how much you changed. For some reason, memories take on a new golden tinge as they become part of the chapter we are closing.

I’m going to share with you the two sources of wisdom that provided me with insight into enjoying life while it is occurring, instead of waiting until the moment is over. First, there’s a song by Billy Joel that pretty much changed my life. Not “Pressure,” although that song is definitely relevant as finals approach. It’s called “Vienna,” and it’s all about valuing life as it is happening.

The advice Billy (we’re on a first name basis…at least in my mind) offers is what makes this song so special to me. “Take the phone off the hook and disappear for awhile” he sings. This is vital to achieving happiness. The routine that we get rooted into with the meetings, classes, deadlines and obligations, causes us to neglect ourselves. I believe we need to clear our schedule every now and then and search for peace, whether it’s going for a walk alone to think or grabbing a coloring book and a box of Crayolas. The only way to get to know ourselves is to spend time with just ourselves. Try disappearing for awhile.

“You can’t be everything you want to be before your time,” Billy also states. Acknowledging that is vital to attaining happiness. I spent a lot of time just wanting to be something, whether it was an “A” student, a college graduate, or a 21 year old. I think I failed to enjoy a lot of the things that happened leading up to those achievements. Only in hindsight did I realize that ages 18-20 and the years of classes leading up to graduation were pretty grand themselves.

Finally, Billy says, “You know when the truth is told, you can get what you want or you can just get old.” Think about that line. Right now we can decide to go after whatever we want, whether it is to join the Peace Corps, get our dream job instead of the practical one, or to travel to Italy. The alternative is just letting life slip by and allowing ourselves to age. The best thing about dreams is that we can make them reality. We are able. Profound? Heck, yes.

Besides the song “Vienna” there is one other source of knowledge I want to share. I have had the privilege of having a friend and teacher who dramatically impacted the way I view the world. Hopefully you have too. My former teacher, Berg, has said many insightful things that changed my attitude towards life, but I’ll just mention two.

Berg once told me he tries to avoid saying “I can’t wait” for something because he knows he can wait and that there’s something wonderful about anticipation. Our lives are littered with the occasional great event, but our days are filled with hopeful anticipation for those events. It’s the waiting that gets us up in the morning and makes those moments great when they arrive. Look at this moment, right now, and enjoy the wait.

Berg also told me that just throwing yourself into something is the best way to learn in the world. He said that when you push (or get pushed) beyond your comfort zone, that is when you learn the most about yourself. With every situation that comes our way, we have a choice about what we want the outcome to be. Usually we take the easiest route, the one that will be least likely to ruffle the feathers we’ve painstakingly arranged. This is unfortunate. I know that the times in my life that I’ve felt completely devoid of anything familiar to lean on are also the times I appreciate the most. Walking away from those experiences, I was a little bit tougher and a bit surer of myself.

I hope that you will take some of this advice. I hope you’ll take a break from the world occasionally. Turn off your cell phone, close your textbook, close Facebook, and just let the way spring smells wash over you; let your mind wander. Don’t just allow your life to merely be a process of aging. When opportunity knocks at your door, don’t just answer it…throw the door back and tackle the opportunity with a bear-hug. While you’re working towards the dreams you’ve decided to chase, acknowledge the joy that comes from anticipation. Push yourself outside of your comfort zone and befriend someone with different views from you, take a class about something you know nothing about, or work somewhere totally unrelated to your major.

I’ll leave you with a few last words from Billy: “Don’t you know that only fools are satisfied? Dream on, but don’t imagine they’ll all come true.” Please go out there, chase contentment to the ends of the earth knowing that it’s the chase that makes you who you are, not always the destination. And know that the dreams you form now can later be the moments you remember with a smile.